tears...

i was in my chair with coffee and several books-bible-journal and laptop. my thoughts were all all over the place this morning in my God time - but parked for a bit on the idea of "tears". knowing that they have been such a part of my life through the years. and i seem to cry easily. i was telling a friend that when we share our "story" - when we share where we have journeyed through pain - affliction - heart break -shame - all those things that God has allowed in our life - when we share that with others that we can trust and know our hearts will be safe - the grip of that pain is loosened in us and we are able to open our heart up for His healing touch. God has done a lot of healing in me in the past 5 years. and i am thankful for that. and i am thankful for the tears. and i am so okay that i am a "crier". :-)

About Ramona...

I know my heart has been stirred deeply within me.
I don't know why. You do.
I pursue and I love and I desire to be used.
This is spiritual, not from me.
I am not capable of dredging up this much love and care for someone that I really do not know.
Guide me Father in this adventure - this season - this moment in time. I want to embrace it.
Do not let me get out of balance or walk or run before you like you know I can do.
Give me your sensitivity and wisdom and power from your spirit to be who and what You want me to be in this.
In a life that is full and busy and at what appears to be at capacity, you seem to have dropped me down onto the side lines of her life, and I am watching, cheering her on, lifting her up,
waiting to be involved, loving her from a distance, yet feeling so close and seeming to know and understand her very heart beat.
i don't know the whys in all this, but you have made a connection and I rest in your arms, and I trust You.
i praise You and thank you that you continue to pour your love and life into me, so that it can overflow and splash onto others.
It is that splash and overflow onto others that I am blessed beyond words to be part of. Drench us with your love and power.

the beach....

... sweet memories float across my mind and leave me feeling very melancholy as i think about our 2 days getting away from the routine of life.

• running on the beach (and i so needed water well before i got back - thoughts of debra race through my mind and her swamp rabbit run!)
• Life Cookies for that much needed afternoon snack - thank you Ramona!
• the water was not very refreshing - it was so warm, still we frolicked like kids and laughed, letting the water wash over us in waves of warmth
• teaching jerry how to float made us laugh so hard. he is like a lead weight!
• i was able to only read 1 more chapter in my book that i was determined to finish this trip before needing a nap - i am hopeless! :-)
  
• i am not sure exactly why - but lauren doing the side stroke in the ocean just made me laugh
• there was a sweet moment in the ocean for some much needed "girl talk" - oh how i love lauren and the uniqueness of our friendship. God was so good to gift her to me.
  
• dinner downtown was good - getting there was a tadbit stressful without a map.
  
• excellent wine with my steak salad with a lovely "cherry" finish
• and let the record reflect that very fact that kc had a kiddie cup of chocolate peanut butter swirl ice cream from ben and jerrys! :-)
  
• bedtime kisses mixed in with some bedtime talk - jer does so well with us girls!
• jer served us coffee this morning and he now knows we prefer caffeine not decaf in the morning!